Thursday, June 30, 2011

And then there was P-Town

Happy Thursday, people!

Growing up in Florida, I'd always heard of 'The Cape' and 'The Vineyard' but I'd never been.  See, Floridians take Winter vacations when all the Northeast snowbirds head south. But we rather like our sunshine state and enjoy sticking around in the summer once all of the spring breakers and would-be-sun-worshipers have long departed. SO, I've never been to 'The Cape' (a.k.a. Cape Cod).


That all changed this past weekend when Mike and I randomly decided to pack up after our German beer experience and head, uhhh... East? North? Northeast?  Yea, one of those.  With no plans but to drive to the end of the cape, we packed an overnight bag and hit the road at the lovely hour of 6am.  Of course, Mike packed a backpack and I packed a duffle bag big enough for me to fit in... options, right?

We drove and it was beautiful.  It's not what I expected, but it was still lovely.  I was anticipating open beach island and being able to see the water from both sides, but it's rather wooded and you can't see the beach for all of the sand dunes. But, those dunes were beautiful and I enjoyed looking from right to left, left to right, to be sure I hadn't missed anything.

We decided to camp. Yes. In a tent. In the bed of the truck. Mike doesn't love camping, but I do and I thought it would suit our impromptu and low budget getaway.  We got a tent space at Dunes Camp Ground in Provincetown and went from there.  The camp site was a 10 minute walk into downtown P-Town (as they say) so we were right in the mix without paying out the nose for peak summer prices.


We made it just in time for the blessing of the fleet and the Portuguese festival.   Now for those of you that don't know Mike, he hates the sun and threatens that he's melting if we switch from the shady to sunny side of the street.  That said, we spent every few blocks ducking in to a bar for a cold drink and some cool air. I don't know if this is secretly his way of getting to have a little pub crawl, but it works. On the other hand, I want to be in the sun, have my drink outside, walk the streets and meet people. We compromise. Sometimes.

On Sunday, while on our little bar crawl, we met Peter and Bob, who took us in, showed us the ropes in P-Town, and gave us the inside scoop on the local things to do, places to eat, and general run-of-show.  Mike and I have a knack for meeting new friends most places we go, but I must say that this find, these two amazing fellas, they took the cake. We laughed, we gossiped, we caught up as if we'd known each other for 10 years or more.  Love.


Peter and Bob told us about the Tea Dance at Boatslip and assured us that it would be a fab time. They were right. Mike and I rolled in, not sure if we'd totally fit in with the crowd, but as soon as we hooked in with our new friends and their group, we felt right at home.  A bit of dancing, some lemon drop shots because.. why not?  This group of gentleman took us in, showed us P-Town the way it's meant to be seen, and won our hearts.

Us with Bob and Peter!

 With bellies filled with yummy drinks and plenty of lobster, we strolled back to our camp ground and had a great sleep, high atop the bed of a Ford F150.  We awoke to the sun and the chirping of birds and the smell of salt air.  I felt at home. Ahhhh... longing for Florida.






















We stopped in to Newport, RI on our way home.  It's our favorite place.  We hit up a few old standbys for food and fun and then made the trek back to CT where our vacay came to an end. Bittersweet. What fun we had for not having a plan. What amazing people we met: Paul 'the mayor', Peter and Bob, P & B's friends.  This was one for the memory books.

Yours in gulf coast dreams,

Whitney

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Hooray for Vacay

I was so tired by the time I got home last night that I couldn't bring myself to write.  A fabulous, impromptu, and random vacation will do that to you. There are so many great details to share, but I'll start with Friday and work through it over the next day or two.

As I said yesterday, Mike is out for summer. Yay for him, boo for me.  I can tell you with 100% honesty that I can't even fake being happy for him that he gets to sleep in as I'm getting ready for work.  When the alarm goes off now, and it's only for me, I am peeved!  I know, I know... teachers work so hard, teachers deal with a lot of stuff, blah blah blah... so do I. And, from June through August, I'm still waking up for work. I didn't get 9 snow days this year, I didn't get 2 spring breaks, and I definitely don't get 2 months to bask in the sun, plan play dates with friends, and go boating all summer. What's that you say?  I'm bitter?  No, never.

Back to the vacay.  Since I took a few days off so as to not feel sorry for myself, Mike planned a few random days of fun.  Friday, we started out for a drive along the shoreline of CT headed East.  We stopped by the Henry Whitfield Museum in Guilford, CT- it's one of the last standing Stone Houses in the country: http://www.newenglandtravelplanner.com/go/ct/ct_shore/guilford/whitfield_muze.html and it was pretty cool.  Mike also took the time to have a portrait made while we were there.  What do you think?

Mrs. Whitfield, is that you?
Or do you prefer this one?

Mr. Whitfield, why so serious?
After this great little trip down history lane, we drove. And drove, and drove. We travelled route 1 from Branford to Groton, only getting on the highway when necessary to cross major bodies of water.  It was beautiful.  We stopped for drinks and snacks at different pubs along the way.  Finally, after a day of exploration, we ended up at http://www.caferoutier.com/ for some dinner and drinks.  We love this place and highly recommend it.  We ran into a few CrossFit friends and then, in true Whitney and Mike style, made friends with an older gentleman named Paul.  He's self-dubbed the 'Mayor of Chester' which is a sweet town in the middle of CT.

We talked with Paul until late into the night and then made our voyage home for some rest.  What a day!  We followed Friday, with a celebratory outing to East Side in New Britain (some of you might know it as Hard Hittin' New Brittin'- indeed, it is.  Our friends Molly and Jeremy had their parents in town which surely meant we needed to take them to the most random German establishment in the middle of a rough city for  gigantic glasses of beer and kraut.  Right?  It was obvious to you, too, huh?
The Beer- over 12inches high

Princess for a meal
Uhhhhhh.....

down sizing to 'testers'- the Germans really know how to drink!

After some fine German beer, some edible food, and Jeremy being spanked with a large oak paddle, we considered the day a success and headed home. Alas, Mike and I had another big adventure planned for the following day. More on that tomorrow.

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Treat Yourself Tuesday

Friends, it's Treat Yourself Tuesday and I highly recommend that you, your loved ones, and anyone else you can drag along treat yourselves to a vacation. Pack some snacks and a pillow and start driving. To where, I don't know. Just GO!

I'm sorry for the long absence, but I was on VACATION!  At long last, a real vacation. Ahhhh... it was so nice.  This post will be short as we just got in last night and I'm blogging from my lunch hour at work. Yes, you guessed it, I had to go straight to work today.  I really think that a buffer day between vacation and work is necessary. I'll plan better next time.

So... we had an impromptu vacation and adventure around New England.  I'll leave you with a brief timeline of photos that will not do justice to the wonderful stories I will share this week.  Mike finished school for the year last week and he's now on the coveted 'Teacher's Summer Vacation' so I took a few days off too and we just drove.

Here are some snippets:

Welcome!

The bridge to freedom from responsibility and stress

My Fearless Road Warrior

Worth it!

The Navigator (sorta)

Dusk on the water... ahhhhh!
So, as I said. More to come. There are so many stories to tell before the next adventure begins. I hope you all had a great weekend too!

Yours in sweet memories,
Whitney

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Oh no she didn't!

A rant:

I love a little deli/coffee shop/grocery called Nica's in the East Rock Neighborhood (my old hood) section of New Haven.  This is the place for me. I go in, people know my name, they know my order at the deli counter, they even bring me over ripe fresh veggies that they know Mike and I like to eat.  I used to live next door to Nica's- literally. Now, living 10 miles away, I still come in every morning for my coffee, fruit or nuts, and whatever else strikes my fancy (they carry the Chocolove bars I wrote about).  I'm pretty sure I've turned many a friend on to this little gem in East Rock and they are now loyal Nica's followers too.  It's that great!

I'm sure many of you have your 'local' place. Even if it's Starbucks or D&D, they know you, you know them, you understand the order of things. For example, at Nica's when you walk in the coffee is located to the left near the register.  While this can be a sometimes congested area, there's a system. Everyone knows it, and if they don't it's not easy to figure out with a quick glance and some common sense.  AND- did I mention that this is some of the B-E-S-T coffee I've had in my life. Seriously. Try it.



So this fine morning, as I'm waiting in line chatting up the cashier who I lent my 4-hour body book to, a woman comes flying into the store as if she were just ejected from a tornado and proclaims to all of us in the coffee line that she's late for work and must cut the line. I'm sorry, 'what!?'. Cut the line?  What are we, seven years old waiting for recess?  There are no 'cuts' in the coffee line.  Isn't this a generally understood social norm?  As a grown up, which I assume she was by the crows feet on her face and the fact that she drove herself to get coffee, you should know better than to a) attempt to get in the way of other adults and their coffee at 7:45am, b) think that 'cutting' in line is an acceptable social practice, and c) that announcing so rudely to a line of people was going to get you anywhere.  So naturally, we all tightened closer to each other, making sure there wasn't the slightest bit of room for her to squeeze in.  Again, she announced she needed to jump in because she was late for work as she is pressing herself into the woman at the coffee station and reaching her go-go-gadget arms up for a cup.

I wanted to shout "Hold the line!, Don't let her in, we're all late for work.", but I didn't.  I think I was so blown away by this woman's behavior that I temporarily lost my ability to fight and protest. Scary, I know!  Sadly, the next person in line did let this crazed lunatic in to get her 'emergency late-for-work coffee' much to my dismay.  I took a mental picture of her. I know who she is now. I will be sure she doesn't pull these shenanigans in the future. And, after her departure, we all childishly talked about her.  I have to admit, it did feel good.  I secretly hope that her coffee accidently fell out of her hand while she was running to her office.  I guess that's not a secret anymore.  Karma, right?

The lesson: don't mess with a line of people who haven't had their coffee yet, and take a moment to assess the situation you storm into and decide what the proper approach should be.  If she'd delicately asked one person in line if she might be able to jump in due to being late, I think we'd all have been less put off. Manners, people, manners!  OR- if you do think that cutting a coffee line at 7:45am is socially acceptable, then you'd better come up with a way better excuse than being late for work.

Ahhhhh... I feel better. And, my coffee tastes great.

Yours in warm coffee love,
Whitney

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

House Guest

Today I am happy to report that Mike and I have cohabitated with Prince Charles for 5 days and everyone is still alive and happy.  You see, we've agreed to foster a little hamster, Prince Charles, while his Mama is in Madagascar and his Mama's guy is interning in Boston at some highfalutin firm.

Soooo... welcome, Prince Charles!


This little furry fuzbuster eats a strict diet of seeds, strawberries, spinach leaves and carrots. What!? A vegetarian rodent?  Good thing for him that I keep plenty of veg in the house. 

Since Prince Charles' arrival, I've created a few nicknames for him (I'm sorry, Rachel!).  He's occasionally called Mr. Bojangles, or Hammy, or Hammy Hamsterson, or Little Man.  How does that even happen.  It's like everytime I go to call him, a new name comes to mind.  Hopefully six weeks of identity crisis won't lead to permanent issues. (again, sorry Rachel!).



At first, Mike pretended not to be interested, but with each coming day I find him over at the plastic mansion that Hammy lives in checking him out.  I think he's hooked. He's not going to be the one petting him or feeding him, but he's checking for signs of life and watching Hammy build his little nest.



So, here's to a summer of hamster-sitting, wheel running, scurrying, and vegetarianism.  I must admit, the little bugger is pretty damn cute.

Yours in hamster love,
Whitney

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Treat Yourself Tuesday

Well, friends. I've made a discovery. Not in the way Columbus supposedly discovered America, but a discovery at Whole Foods. Yep. The grocery store.

Today, I write to tell you about the Japanese Sweet Potato.  This is no ordinary sweet potato- there's no bright orange center, and the skin on the outside is darker and rougher (is that a word?) than the average SweetPot, but I think that's all part of they mystery of this wonderful food.

I had finished swim practice for my swim across the sound ( https://give.stvincents.org/sslpage.aspx?pid=564&tab=0&frsid=1187 my shameless plug for support), and I stopped in to Whole Foods to grab some groceries for the week. I saw a fellow CrossFitter checking out these mystery potatoes so I followed along. Boy, am I glad I did.

Behold, the Japanese Sweet Potato!  While this little baby looks similar to a buttery, yummy baked potato, I assure it's not! Not even close. This potato has more sweet and delicious flavor than it's bright orange counterpart, and is definitely more nutritious than it's Idahoan cousin. 


SO... treat yourself!  Check out your grocery store or Whole Foods and see if they have them. No butter necessary, although a sprinkle of cinnamon might be lovely.  If you find them, let me know what you think and how you prepared them.  In the pic above, I wrapped it in saran wrap and microwaved it for 5 minutes for my lunch at work. Quick, easy, and wonderful.

yours in sweet love,
Whitney

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Community

I think community is a great word that evokes feelings of happiness, excitement, and interest for me. Especially this time of year when people are out on the streets, there are festivals and farmer's markets and summer concerts on the green.  To me, it's about getting out in your community, as well as forming a community of friends in the area that you get together with.  Whether it's a fitness or running group, a sewing group, a mom's group, or a team sport. Gathering with a group of likeminded people to have a little fun and broaden your horizons is a great thing.

So often we get stuck in the day to day of our busy lives that we don't always look for new and fun ways to spend our time. Sure, there's a little work involved in researching summer concert locations or in finding times and locations for certain events, but I bet you're always glad you took the time to do it while you're enjoying the great happenings in your community.  I also love trying new things we hear about.  Last year, Mike and I participated in New Haven's ClueFest.  We initially thought 'what the heck' and just showed up figuring we'd bail if it was lame. We ended up having the best time with an incredible team and are SO looking forward to it again this year. 

Today, I'm headed to a Saturday morning work out at CrossFit New Haven (my community).  And, if our schedule permits, we're hoping to stop by this comedy show I learned about yesterday.  It supports a local youth baseball team and sounds like something fun and new to try:

The Ct. Hurricanes and The Tri-State Entertainment Group Want YOU…

…to enjoy an evening of music and stand up Comedy!


Featuring:
 Joe Moffa (The Italian Nightmare) and
Stacey Homayoon (from the Howard Stern Show)

THIS Saturday…6/18/11

Doors open at 7:30pm

The Knights of Columbus
2630 Whitney Avenue
Hamden

$25.00 per person

Proceeds to benefit
 The Connecticut Hurricanes Baseball Team


So do yourself a favor and check out what's happening in your community today. Happy Saturday!

Yours in summer fun,

Whitney

Friday, June 17, 2011

Fill in the blank Friday... Hooray!

Fill in the Blank Friday
 
I'm following in the footsteps of my sweet friend, Amanda (http://lovemygr8life.blogspot.com/) and starting Fill in the Blank Fridays.
 
I hope you all have a wonderful weekend.  And, if you have a moment, don't forget to read yesterday's post and check out my SEAGURLS Swim Across the Sound page.  Thanks to all that have already sent wonderful words of encouragement and extremely generous contributions. You are loved.

1.   The last movie I saw was       Pirates of the Caribbean (which ever number is out now) with Mike at the movie theater- big stretch for me, I know.

2.  I want to    get home to Florida to see my family desperately.

3.  Surprises are     always surprising and fun- even when they aren't what you expect, it's a great way to remind yourself to roll with the punches and work with what you've been dealt.  And, if you're like my dear friend, April, you will ask people to take surprise face pictures because surprises are so fun!

4.  The best accessory is   a piece of jewelry that is sentimental or meaningful, or super fun shoes.

5.  My favorite warm drink is     hot chocolate with peppermint schnapps.

6.  My favorite cold drink is       Canada Dry Diet Ginger Ale (I know it has the chemical stuff, but it's SO good)   .

7.  Currently loving       taking care of my flowers in my little garden, and black coffee with a bit of cinnamon


Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Treat Yourself Tuesday

Hello Blogosphere!

Today is Treat Yourself Tuesday.  I'll keep it short and sweet. 

Have you heard of So Delicious Coconut Products?  That's their name as well as their tasty description.



In this day and age it seems like so many people have developed allergies to dairy, gluten, soy, and much more.  These yummy products are dairy, gluten and soy free and they are SO good. 

They also have wonderful desserts that don't make you feel guilty for eating them.  Even if you don't have a food allergy, but you're a paleo eater or someone who's looking for healthier alternatives to their unhealthy stand bys- these products are for you! 


I've made the transition to black coffee these days, but I'll tell you, the coconut milk on a 'cheat' day or a day when you need just a bit more than a dash of cinnamon in your coffee to get you through is the perfect touch. Go for it.  AND- it's not overly coconutty... so if you don't love coconut, don't shy away from this stuff. There's a ton of great research out there now about the health benefits of coconut and coconut water and milk.  Read up friends, this aint your grandmothers nutrition guide... things are a changin'.

Check our their site for all of their product types- yogurt, milk, ice cream and other novelty desserts.  Here's their website: http://sodeliciousdairyfree.com/

In CT, I find this stuff at Whole Foods and Stop and Shop.

So TREAT YOURSELF and check it out!

Yours in coconut dreams,
Whitney

Monday, June 13, 2011

South vs. North

Hello Friends, happy Monday!

I write today with an interesting debate and question for you.  What is your definition of Bar-b-que (aka- barbecue, BBQ)?

This weekend we celebrated a dear friend's birthday with a cook-out (you guessed it, with the fancy new grill!!)  Mike and I invited people over for a cookout with all of the familiar food stuffs: burgers, dogs, brats, salads, chips and dips, and ice cream cake!  But enough about that- back to the question at hand.

Having grown up and spent 26 years in the South, I'm a believer that you invite people over for a cookout and you serve them up some Bar-b-que while they're there.  I believe that Bar-b-que is both a type of food preparation and it's own food item (usually consisting of pulled pork, vineager, and some secret spices).  I'd also go so far as to say that you could call items cooked on the grill, like chicken, Bar-b-que'd- hence BBQ chicken, due to the method of preparation on the grill.

Now having lived here in CT for 5 years now, I've heard some frightening off shoots of our beloved Bar-b-que.  I've discovered that folks in the Northeast consider both the cook-out itself to be a BBQ, as well as, the grill to be called 'a bar-b-que'.  In other words- they propose that you could host a BBQ and cook BBQ on the BBQ (which could be burgers, dogs, corn, etc...).  Like I said in the beginning, I'm curious to know what you all think- but in my opinion, I've gotta call BS (I mean bar-b-que sauce by that, Mom, don't worry) on that one.  

So.... what's your definition?  Post to the comments (don't forget to be sure your comment posts- you may have to enter a scrambled word for security).  Be sure to tell me how you define a bar-b-que and claim your geographical allegiance.

Speaking of food served at a cook-out, check out my deviled egg concoction below:

I've never made deviled eggs before and I wanted to create a recipe myself without consulting any cookbooks. I had an idea of the basic ingredients and just went with it.

To start, I hard boiled the eggs to perfection (Thanks, Mom, for teaching me how to boil the perfect egg!)


Then run cold water over the eggs to completely cool them down.  This is important, I discovered, in order to get the yolks out cleanly.  Next, peel the eggs and halve them.  Once halved (if they are cool), you should be able to spoon the yolks out neatly.  Place them in a separate bowl and do your best to keep the egg whites in tact.


Once all the yolks are in a small bowl, add your favorite ingredients.  I used creamed horshradish, mayo, a hint of mustard, and a bit of pickle relish, salt, pepper, and a touch of cayenne pepper. Go light on the mayo at first and add a bit at a time so it's not too runny.  With 12 yolks, I used about a 1/4 cup in the end because of the creamy horshradish.
I recommend combining these items in a small bowl with a fork so you don't mash up the yolks too much and lose the thickness.



Then, refill the egg whites, top with a sprinkle of paprika and refridgerate until you're ready to serve.  These babies have a great spicy kick, but maintain the classic flavor of a devlied egg.  They were a huge hit at the party. I'm excited to update this recipe throughout the summer and try new ingredients. What do you use?

The finished product
Well, friends, I look forward to hearing your thoughts on the cook-out/bbq debate. Bring it!

Yours in southern pride,

Whitney

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Treat Yourself! Seriously.

It's the weekend. What are you doing inside on the computer?  Get out, play in the sun (or the rain!). 

And while you're outside, go to the store and treat yourself to one of these babies:
You will thank me later, don't worry.  This might be one of the most delicious little treats I've found in a long time. I mean, it's no coconut cupcake, but hey... it does the trick.  You can find these at Whole Foods, Nica's Market, sometimes at Target (limited flavors).

And, incase that's not your flavor speed, you should try this one instead:
Don't give me any lip about the caffeine in the coffee beans. Just eat it.  Again, you will thank me later.

Happy Saturday, Friends! 

Yours in chocolove,
whitney

Friday, June 10, 2011

Happy Birthday, Daddy!

For those of you that have known me a while, you might know this guy as Mr. Kevin, Kev, or Mr. Doel (but he’d yell at you for that!).  For those of you I’ve met more recently, this is my dear, ole Dad- Kevin Doel.  His birthday is this weekend, so why not kick it off on Friday with a birthday shout-out.



In reflecting on my Daddy-o’s birthday, I’m amused at the place my thoughts go straight to.  My first instinct is to tell you all about my childhood memories with this guy.  While he’s certainly had a profound impact on my life as an adult, I really think the foundation is laid so early in life. 


Me and Dad on a chrorus trip circa 1997

Before I get into the details, I'll share a few highlights about this guy as he rounds the corner to age 56:
  • He's an Ironman Triathlete. Just saying.
  • He's a hard core cyclist- the guy finishes century rides before most of us have had our coffee.
  • He's a proud father of three.
  • He's a computer scientist... which makes him responsible for all technology questions by default.
  • He's a former Toronto Blue Jay, by way of the AAA team in Dunedin, FL.
  • He's an incredible chef, albeit an amateur with no formal training, this guy can crank out some incredible recipes.
  • He can eat things spicier than I can even be in the room for. Example: he eats scotch bonnets like we eat grapes. H-O-T.

Mr. Kevin and the Doel Kids

More importantly, he's the guy that taught us that it was ok to be ourselves, it was ok to wear mix-matched outfits to school if we liked it, exercise was important and necessary, you didn't have to clean your plate but you sure had better get some veggies in that body, it's OK to debate and express differing opinions as long as you do it with respect, and so many more great gems of life. And- did I mention he's a creative nickname giver- Squeezer Dang, here.


Dad and Me in Eger, Hungary last summer

So with all of that said, here's to you Dad!  Happy Birthday!!!


1999

Love,
Squeezer

Thursday, June 9, 2011

A girl and her grill... a love story.

We recently purchased a grill. A real, official, grown up, GAS GRILL!!!  Sadly, I think I was more excited about the grill than Mike was, but he was gracious enough to set me free at Lowe's in search of 'the one.'  With Mike's truck keys in hand and a taste for a grilled burger in mind, I was on a mission.

After a 30 minute Q & A session with Jim from Lowes, I was loaded up and on my way home with this new baby:


Ain't she a bute?  There are so many things to consider when making a purchase such as this.  I think gas is a given, or is it?  And- do you need the side burner, or does it take up space and get used rarely?  What's the difference between infared heatingand just regular gas burners?  Does it matter?
I was blown away by all of the options available for a novice griller. I mean, seriously- Lowe's even sells BBQ sauce and cook books in the grill section. I'm sorry, but I'll save my edible items for a store that remotely resembles a grocery. But, I did fall victim to the allure of the scrubby bruch/scratch pad thing and the matching set of tongs, prongs, and spatula. Mike made me return them for 'smaller' ones because we don't have Go-Go-Gadget arms, apparently.

Soooooo... with that said. I'm working on capturing some of my grilling masterpieces on digital film to share with you. Stay tuned for that.  I only wish I could share the wonderful smells of cooking hunks of meat and veg with you through this blog.  If any of you have a spare white grilling chef hat (You know, Like at Long Horn and Texas Road House) feel free to mail it to me at the beach  :)

Yours in grill marks,

Whitbo

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Look 'em in the eyes...

Today's blog is about a recent observation I've made regarding communication.  If you know me, you know I'm a talker, a listener, a question asker, and story teller.  I like to make sure that people feel involved in the conversation and I also want them to know I'm interested and listening to what they say. This, however, leaves me with my most recent observation- the awkwardness and overthinking involved with making eye contact.



Growing up, I was always taught to look at someone when they were speaking to you.  More importantly, look someone in the eye- it was a sign of respect, showed you were listening, and was 'good manners.'  In fact, I'm pretty sure on an occasion or two this was shouted at me after I'd done something to get myself in trouble and was feeling a bit embarrassed, hanging my head waiting to hear my punishment- "Look at me when I'm talking to you!"   

As an adult, I notice on a regular basis that a lot of people don't look you in the eyes when they are speaking to you, or when you are speaking to them.  Why?  Had they missed out on the fine Southern manners I was taught?  Are they distracted and not listening fully?  Are they nervous, perhaps not comfortable with making that level of contact or connection?  OR, am I just talking too much?

As a person who always looks you in the eye when you speak to me, I can understand why some people opt not to. Have you ever noticed that it's hard to look someone in both eyes, at the same time?  You usually end up looking at just one of their eyes or alternating between their left and right eyes.  Or worse, you stare in between their eyes at the space above their nose and between their eyebrows.  Awkward.  Do you think they can notice that I'm having trouble deciding where to look?  AND- when in a loud bar or space where it's difficult to hear, I find myself looking at someone's mouth instead of making eye contact. Is that rude? 

Sometimes I find myself concentrating so hard on making sure to look 'em in the eyes, that I actually don't hear what the person is saying.  I find myself being so concerned about making sure the person speaking to me knows that I am interested and listening that I focus too intently. But, I truly am interested and want to concentrate with my full attention.  I've also found that when I transition to the lip reading gaze, it makes people unnecessarily uncomfortable and begin to skim their teeth with their tongue as if they have food caught in their teeth. Sorry! Just trying to be sure I know what you're saying.



These types of observations are what fascinates me about social interaction and communication.  Everyone has their style, their way. That's what makes us unique and interesting and keeps us talking.  Gotta love human interaction and all of the wonderful and awkward things that go along with it. 

So next time you find yourself telling a story or deep in conversation, pay attention to your interaction style.  Do you go for the single eye stare?  The above-the-nose gaze?  The back and forth gander? What's your style?

-Whitney